Once more, with feeling

Forgive me bloggy, for I have sinned..

2009-03-25T02:06:31Z

(Oh I was moved by your screen dream: The Jolene to my Dolly..)

I have a confession to make. I’ve been cheating on this blog.

I know, I know. I am a terrible blogger. But I was checking out “Blogger” recently, I got inspired to start a new blog account. I just wanted to see how it felt. I thought it would be a onetime thing but things got so hot I blogged three more times. I feel dirty but I have to admit, I kinda like it.

I’m not saying that I’m giving up on this blog. We’re just taking a break. I’ll see how things go with the new blog and if it isn’t working, I’ll crawl back to this one like I feel Brad Pitt will do to Jennifer Aniston once he realizes how ridiculous Angelina and her baby brood are. Perhaps I’ll bring some Santana DVX to ease the sitch a bit. We’ll see if it happens.

If you want to check out the other blog, he is located at Oh, I was moved by your screen dream. And tell me, honestly, isn’t he kinda sexy?

P.S – I’ve heard people are making “TEAM OMWF” and “TEAM OIWMBYSC” shirts. Please don’t buy one yet. This split is not official. Plus, they just look ridiculous.

"There are movie shows, downtown..": Oh, the plights and delights of loving River Phoenix..

2009-03-21T03:16:12Z

E is for Exuberant

M is for Magnificent

I is for Inspirational

L is for Loud

Y is for Yummy

My Own Private Idaho is playing at the Revue next Wednesday and Thursday (as part of a Gus Van Sant double-feature alongside Milk.) That’s it. I’m moving downtown.

I miss River Phoenix like mad.

P.S – I have become a semi-true acronym subject thanks to some rando blog quiz. I wouldn’t classify myself as “loud” - in fact, just the opposite. But I suppose it’s better than lethargic.

Let's go bang(s)! I wanna go bang(s)..

2009-03-20T04:56:23Z

GAH! Just remembered that I have a hair appointment tomorrow. I’ve been having an internal debate about whether or not to get full on bangs (à la Zooey Deschanel) and I have yet to resolve it. These lovely bang-on examples (this is me trying to sneak a terrible pun) of awesome ladies don’t help the cause.

Something about Scrooge!

2009-03-20T04:23:09Z

“Your Grandpa Olaf was a wise man..”

Watching The Office tonight made me appreciate How I Met Your Mother. Usually I love The Office and its this-is-so-awkward-I-can’t-help-but laugh tone but tonight, things fell flat for me. This week’s episode of HIMYM however was out of this world. Literally.

At one point in the episode (“Front Porch”), Jason Segel’s character Marshall defied gravity. Let me explain. During a truly hilarious sleepover party at Marshmellow and Lilypad’s abode, Marshall whips out his choice evening lounge wear: the night shirt. The idea of it would have been enough to satisfy me for a week but they took it to levels I couldn’t have even imagined. In order to explain Marshall’s fondness for the sleep time frock (I just realized that there is an infinite number of amazing ways to classify a night shirt), they showed him wearing his nightie whilst floating over the midnight sky in ecstasy to Bob Dylan.

Now, I’m not even a Bob Dylan fanatic but I love me some movie references and this one was a shoutout to the one of the only scenes I really loved in The Big Lebowski. And this happened not once, but twice in the episode! First, it was just Marshall but then later when Barney converted from Suit-jamas worship to night shirt devotion, both boys floated around on a free-wheelin’ PJ high. It’s times like these I wonder if the peeps at HIMYM HQ are tapping into my mindhole.

The point is I love HIMYM and night shirts. Especially on Jason (Melissa says I’m “in love” him. But that’s just her way of trying to explain why she doesn’t like Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I worship it. Plus, I’m in love with Emile Hirsch. Jason is my endearing 6-foot-4 side project. Also, she says she is fully prepared to rock a tracking device in case me and Jason get married so that we can make sure she and her ultimate nemesis - Paul Rudd - never get too close. It's too much of a risk otherwise). As he said himself, it’s just flat-out sexy. And it leaves no judgemental pink teeth marks around the Thanksgiving belly.

P.S. – News! I got free passes to see an advanced screening of Adventureland next week via The Eyeopener! I am beyond psyched since I love everyone in it (Ryan Reynolds, you’re not just Mr. ScarJo to me!) I just hope Bill Haverchuck doesn’t get cut off mid-funk again. I don’t think I could deal with such a loss.

P.P.S - Saw Britney last night! It was fan-fucking-tastic. Will give full report later complete with an overload of red glitter (All will be explained..).

Whatever major loser! (Or, a little birdy told me I had an addiction to online trends..)

2009-03-17T03:51:42Z

I am now twittering (tweeting?). Yeah, I know. I’m not sure how I feel about it either but it’s worth a try, right? If you don’t have an account, get one and follow moi, s’il vous plait.

GAH! Must go. Snuggie commercial on. How am I surviving without a blanket with arms?

P.S - Why haven't I watched Loser in ages?! I miss when Jason Biggs was a semi-leading man/goofball and not a sidekick to Dane Cook. And when “Teenage Dirtbag” was on heavy rotation on The Hit List. :-)

"Die. Die. Die." I can now.

2009-03-10T04:30:39Z

("That's 4.")

Tonight on HIMYM, Jason Segel forgot his pants. Why couldn’t that have happened on Thursday, when I saw him at MOD?

I shouldn’t complain because I got to see my favourite Freaks-boy in the flesh (not in a Forgetting Sarah Marshall (B-t-dubs, check out this fan-fucking stastic live vid of "Dracula's Lament". Some dude asked Jason to do it at a screening..and he did!) sense. Unfortunately..). But honestly, I’m actually having a hard time believing that I actually saw him. I was just too excited at the time to comprehend it. But he was there, next to me in his full 6 foot 4 goodness. And he totally waved at us. It was legendary. And I’m not just saying that because I love me some Barney Stinson.

Oh and did I mention that “Lady L” defs came up in the interview. Naturally, I screamed like a fourth-grader who just saw the ice cream truck after school on a Friday. Good thing everyone else screamed, because if not, I would have definitely looked like both a freak and a geek (I have TOO much fun with these plays on F&G).

The only thing that was pure suckage was that Nick Andopolis didn't get to get his rather large hands on my F&G booklet. I would have died for a signature. But hey, I got to see him, right? It just pissed me off because the guy beside me who had an obnoxiously large I Love You, Man poster shoved it in Jason's face as he was leaving and got it signed. Then, as I went to put my booklet out there, Jason had to go. But he did give me a signature Nick/Marshall look as he said "Sorry guys!" and got pulled away.

Anywhos, the point is, my life is complete now. Big gigantic drum set found. :-)

(So trippy..I think Mr. Andopolis would approve. Not as cool as Lazerdome, but still.)

The mod club (or how I learned to stop coughing and start lip synching..for my life!)

2009-03-08T04:32:25Z

"I want to go to a place where I am nothing and everything - that exists between here and nowhere. I wanna go to a place where time has no consequences. Oh yeah. The sky opens my prayers. I want to go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful..." - Beautiful (India Arie)

Mod robes are back! No, I’m not talking about those effin’ hids 90s “You could fit a family of 5 in these” pants. I’m talking about the uber-delish dresses on Modcloth.com, my latest obsession.

This might sound très nerdy but I discovered Mod Cloth because of Perez Hilton. One of the advertisements on the sidebar of his trashtastic site (I mean that in the best way) has always featured a slideshow of hopelessly adorable retro-style dresses. Everytime I visited the site (and friendlies, that’s too often to count), I found myself longing to lounge around in an Audrey Hepburn-esque cocktail dress or two. But still, I resisted my urge to click on the irresistible sidebar and continued along with my day. Today everything changed.

I am currently down with some sort of throat-attacking cold and so I’ve spent most of the day on the couch, catching up on readings and watching a shitload of terribly awesome TV (Tell me you’ve watched RuPaul’s Drag Race already because it might be my new favourite show. For serious. The drag competition involves a segment in which RuPaul tells the two most unworthy drag queens that it’s “Time to lip sync for your life!” And boy, do they ever) and guilty pleasure movies (I watched The Faculty today – why isn’t that movie on everyone’s favourite list? It’s weirdly awesome and 100% 90s down to the Clea-Duvall-has-an-eyeliner-fetish jokes). In the process, I suddenly got the urge to indulge in a less guilty - but just as delish - pleasure, a little Sex and the City. As I watched Carrie strut her Manolos down the streets of Manhattan in a beautiful vintage-inspired skirt after gorgeous retro-style dress, I couldn’t help but wonder, maybe I should give this mysterious website a chance. And girls, I think I’m in love.

Okay, so the clothes are definitely not in my price range right now but, they sure are fun to look at for extended periods of time (see the gorgeous look from above - is it just me or would Carrie totally rock the second one?). And perhaps, one day, when school ends and I start working like a crazy woman again, my gorgeous canary yellow sundress will come. J

(Miss Bradshaw that dress is by far the cutest doggone dress around town! Do not pardon the pun. )

Like the color purple, where do it come from? Open your eyes. See what Oprah has done..

2009-03-06T04:10:57Z

Dear God, dear stars, dear trees, dear sky, dear peoples, dear everything...

The beautiful Miss Alice Walker once said, “I think it pisses off God when you walk by the color purple in a field and not notice it.” I’m not God or anything (that is obviously a role reserved only for Mr. Freeman) but I will be pretty pissed if you watch this video of The Color Purple musical (supported avidly by Hollywood's Sofia, Oprah Winfrey) and don’t notice how amazing it is.

Normally, I would express my utter devotion to this show a little more extensively with a 500 word love letter to it but, to quote Miss (I think the Southern charm of Celie is rubbing off on me) Shug Avery, it’s too beautiful for words.

Amen. <3

P.S. - Is it weird that one of my goals is to become one of the church ladies in this show? And not to play one, but actually become one - complete with a big brimmed hat, a penchant for midday gossiping, a love for personal fans and and one hell of a set of sassy vocal skills.

From full-frontal to front page: Jason Segel and the Apatow boys get fleshed out for Vanity Fair!

2009-03-05T02:36:17Z

Take a gander at this fantastic spread of man-flesh! As if I needed another reason to hyperventilate about seeing Jason Segel and Paul Rudd in the not-so-nekked flesh tomorrow at MuchMusic. Thanks geniuses at Vanity Fair.

P.S - Don't get the joke? Think 2006. Scarlett Johannson, Tom Ford, Keira Knightley and a ridiculous amount of unnecessary nudity.

Britney's setlist revealed!: Spears' Circus brings us the hits, one more time!

2009-03-02T23:24:29Z

Britney’s big comeback seems to be actually happening, y’all!

Brit-Brit’s tour starts tomorrow but today the set list was posted on her site. I don’t know about you, but I’m beyond psyched to see Miss Brit do her stuff. I just wish she included some more oldies. I mean, what’s this with no “(You Drive Me) Crazy (Remix)”?!? I used to pretty much worship my “Britney-goes-Grease” doll based on her cat eyes glasses/pink 50s diner ensemble from the video. Plus, the song was in a movie with Melissa Joan Hart. It deserves some respect.

And is it just me or is the set actually light on the new stuff? I really love “Blur”, “Unusual You” and “Kill the Lights” but it seems like none of those are gonna make it on stage. L

Setlist qualms aside, I am anxiously awaiting Brit-Brit’s stop in T.O. I haven’t seen the old girl since Grade 7 (Oh god, that was looooong ago). And I totally neglected the “In the Zone” tour. I know, I was obvi having a complete lapse of judgement. But Britney babe, how was I supposed to know? Oh pretty baby I shouldn’t have let you go! My loneliness is killing me now. Don’t you know I still believe - that you will be here, so gimme a sign. Oh, hit me baby one more time!

(Look at Brit and her mini-dress with black tights. So fashion forward!)

BRITNEY COUNTDOWN: 18 days left baby!

What's cooler than bein' cool? Matt Nathanson Poladroids!

2009-02-24T02:55:00Z

So, this one time I was reading Dan Levy’s blog....

WHAAAT? I haven’t been reading Dan Levy’s blog religiously or anything. Only semi-daily. :-)

Anywhos, the point is Danny boy (mmm..not so much? I didn’t think so either) brought my attention to the greatest thing on earth. If you haven’t heard, Polaroid is stopping production on its instant cameras and their film this year. This has caused indie kiddies and girls with fuchsia pink Spice Girls instant cameras to go into a deep and dark depression. But fear not! There is a savoir! It is called Poladroid and it’s awesome!

What is this Poladroid gadget, you ask? Well, it’s not a gadget at all (sorry, no “go go gadgets” today..). It’s a program. Just go to the Poladroid website, download it and you can fake the vintage-y look that only a Polaroid picture can make possible. All you have to do is drag your photo of choice into the camera and wah bam! You have yourself a faux Polaroid! And yes, you can shake it Outkast style (Apparently you are not actually supposed to do this to real Polaroids. Shame on you Andre!). I know, genius right?

But beware kiddies, this newfangled application is highly addictive. As you’ve seen from my Matt Nathanson Polodroid madness above, things can get a bit out of control. Espesh when the subjects of the photos are a man as ridiculously good looking as Matty (FYI: The concert was in November but I only got the pics recently. No, I’m not just obsessively looking at them. But I will say, I don’t hate em’! Good job Vi!).

The point is, if you don’t love Matt, Dan or Polodroid, I don’t think we can be friends. Or I’ll have to punch your jeans. I’ve said it before. Best believe this is not a metaphor.

The Oscars get School-ed?

2009-02-22T18:29:07Z

Just when I thought I didn’t need another reason to drool excessively over the Oscars, JustJared announces that Zac Efron will be going a legendary group of musical peeps for some sort of group performance during tonight’s ceremony! LOVES IT! Now if only Jason Segel and his undead puppets would make an appearance...

P.S. – Why is that skanky brunette chick always following Zac around? It’s getting a bit sad.

Emaline, the von Trapps and Emile's latest bromance: These are a few of my favourite things..

2009-02-22T05:45:04Z

“When the dog bites, when the bee strings, when I’m feeling sad, I simply remember my favourite things and then I don’t feel so bad..”

While I do enjoy raindrops on roses, whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woollen mittens, right now, I'm totally in love with the song "I am Sixteen (Going on Seventeen)" from The Sound of Music. I saw the Toronto production a few weeks ago and ever since, I’ve had this splendid little ditty in my head. The song is just so adorable to begin with but the Rolfe in that particular production made it even more so. He was a definite hottie. Well, until he went all Nazi. Then our relationship got weird. Damn, why do I have to love the horrible ones (Patrick Bateman anyone? Mark Wahlberg in Fear? Christian Bale just in general?)?

The point is I am suddenly feelin’ the Sound of Music love. I honestly had no interest in it before, but after seeing it again, I totally converted to the von Trapp fan-hood. I mean, god, how can you not love “Something Good” or “Edelweiss” (I get teary-eyed thinking of it..)? They are just tops.

Besides harnessing some serious love for the Von Trapp fam jam (screw you octopulet mom, I doubt your 14 kids will be able to sing “The Lonely Goatherd”!), I have also become slightly fixated on this Ben Folds tune called “Emaline”. It’s just beautiful. There’s one line that just kills me every time I listen to it: “Now, I wish it was last September so we could lose ourselves in crowds everyday”. I don’t know why but I find it so bittersweet and soulful. Maybe it reminds me of my favourite thing from the otherwise lame month of September – TIFF? Or perhaps it’s just that Ben is a god of beauteous phrasing? Oh, and I love that the song sort of has my name in it! Benny boy, you and your moniker themed tunes rock my world.

Also, can I just say that I am recovering from the mindblowingly orgasmic fact that Hirsch-y Kisses attended Justin Timberlake's William Rast show at Fashion Week? I knew that they knew each other (hello, terrible excuse for a movie that is Alpha Dog!) but I had no idea they were BFF!! I mean, Emile was sitting beside Jessica Biel, JT's serious gf! They are for serious having a bromance and let me tell you, I'm lovin' it (wow, I totally made a JT reference and I didn't even try..).

Well, friendlies, it’s late. The sun has gone to bed and so must I. So long. Farewell. Auf Weidersehen. Goodbye.

I love you, Ben Folds, and kinda-sorta can't hardly wait for a big screen Beth Cooper..

2009-02-19T05:16:26Z

George Stroumbo is my boyfriend.

Seriously, I’m watching The Hour and he just said “It’s your boyfriend here, George Stroumboulopoulos”. It’s about time he made things public. (BTW: Lovin’ the purple argyle sweater sweetums).

Okay enough about me and George. Yesterday Vi and I went to see Sir Ben Folds at the Kool Haus. I knew he was going to be cooler than cool but let me tell you, he blew my mindhole.

The man is truly a god in geek glasses. I mean, at one point, in order to play “Free Coffee”, he put Altoids cases on his piano strings as a way of creating a synth sound. And it was mindblowingly good! Later, he played conductor to the audience’s “ohhhhaahhhs” during the chorus of “Not The Same” and made it seem like we actually had decent voices. After that he led his band through a great rendition of an old BFF (Ben Folds Five) song, “Tom and Mary”, even though they had never played it before. Then, when someone yelled out that he play “Army”, he made up a fake army song on the spot complete with references to cavity searches and ROTC. And it sounded like an actual track. Oh and did I mention that he ended my favourite track, “Army”, by referencing the best song ever made, “Don’t Stop Believin’”? Instead of repeating, “I thought about the army”, he sang “just a small-town girl”. It was pretty much miraculous.

As if his quirky performance techniques weren’t enough, the man played EVERY song I love. Before the show, I has looked up some recent set lists and was kind of worried he wouldn’t play my favs, but the man rocked them all: “Landed”, “Kate”, “Kylie From Connecticut”, “Zak and Sara”, “Not the Same”, “Alice Childress” and of course, “Army” (singing “Well, I thought about the army. Dad said son, you’re fuckin’ high!” is so much better in a room full of Ben Folds fanatics). It was like he was reading my mind. I wouldn’t be surprised actually, because the man is just so great he’s verging on magical.

Speaking of magic, Ben revealed that he will be making sweet music alongside Nick Hornby, the way-too-cool author of About a Boy, High Fidelity and Fever Pitch. Nick will pen the lyrical side of the album and Benny boy will make the music to match. I don’t think anything could be more wonderfully geek chic. Wait, I take that back. Ben’s opening act was an a cappella group (BTW! Andy from The Office is totally in Confessions of a Shopaholic, which I saw tonight avec Bailamos and really enjoyed!) from York that sang Ben’s own “Underground” and “Don’t Stop Believin’”. And wait, it gets better. Ben says he’s releasing a CD that’s just a cappella groups covering his tracks. For serious. Can this man get any greater?

I better stop myself before I write 5,000 words on Ben’s awesomeness. In other I’m-a-big-nerd news, I am having an internal debate about the new trailer for the big screen adaptation of Larry Doyle’s hilarious book, I Love You Beth Cooper. I loved the book so much because it reminded me of other one-day -in-the-life teen flicks like Dazed and Confused, Superbad and of course, the holy grail of 90s movies in my heart, Can’t Hardly Wait. While the trailer seems to follow the book to a tee, I have to say, I’m not as excited about the movie as I thought I would be. Maybe it’s because Hayden Panettiere is playing Beth Cooper and I can’t stand her (exception: Remember the Titans – because she was still cute and not a over-tanned media whore). Or perhaps it’s because the guy playing Denis is not Dan Byrd (I’m still waiting for him to star in the fictionalized teen drama about video store clerks Sara and I made up). In reality, it’s probably just that I’ve come to realize that Denis will never be Preston Meyers and Beth Cooper is no Amanda Beckett.

Speaking of CHW, did someone order a loveburger, well done? Cause I’m getting a craving for nice helping of 90s teen angst via Smash Mouth, Barry Manilow (Fun factoid: Mama Gagne might see The Man-ilow himself in Vegas next week! He best play "Mandy" and of course, "Copacabana") and Guns N’ Roses.

My Buffy valentine's..

2009-02-16T05:26:35Z

Yesterday, while everyone else in the world was celebrating their valentines, I was having a different kind of V-Day celebration. I was celebrating my favourite vampire slayer – Miss Buffy Summers.

While the fam jam was a hockey game (shocking I know), I ordered in food, drank a glass of champagne, grabbed some chocolate and settled down with the last four episodes of the final season of Buffy. And let me tell you, it was the best Valentine’s Day I’ve ever had.

I’ve been watching BTVS since last February and so watching the Scoobies save the world for the last time was kind of sad. I feel like I’ve put so much into these characters over the past year and so I didn’t want to leave without feeling satisfied with where they had ended up. But thankfully, the finale – the terrifically titled “Chosen” – was just the ticket for this Buffy fanatic.

From that fang-tastic Buffy-Angel kiss that started the episode to the epic battle which brought the gang back to the halls of Sunnydale high, I loved everything about my final patrol with the Buffster and the gang. There were so many subtle references to the rest of the series that really made me feel like things had come full circle. For instance, the First, the Big Bad of season seven, recited the original speech from the 1^st season’s opening credits: “Into every generation, a slayer is born. One girl in all the world. She alone will have the strength and skill to fight the vampires, to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their numbers”. This was not only a great reference for all the hardcore Buffy fans but a great plot device as it helped Buffy achieve the master plan that would save the world – again.

Another terrific reference came when the original Scoobies (Buffy, Xander, Willow and Giles) got together for a talk before the final fight. Over the past season, you hardly got to see these four connect and banter like they did in the old days. But in this short but totally awesome scene, the gang was reverted back to the early days at Sunnydale high when Spike was still a bloody enemy , Willow was still straight and Buffy had only died once. Buff, Xander and Will chatted about what they were going to do after the fight (shopping!) and Giles stood behind them, shaking his head and rehashing the line from the season 1 finale, “Prophesy Girl”: “The world is definetly doomed.” It was the perfect way to sum up the unique relationship between these four and it started the endless stream of waterworks that would keep flowing until the end of the episode.

Besides the fangirly squee-inducing references, one of the most heart wrenching and terrific moments of the episode was the final fight between Buffy and the Potentials (slayers in waiting), and the First’s army of Uber-Vamps. While at first it seemed like just another patrol, things got magical – both literally and figuratively – when Willow did her final and most important spell of all time. In a lovely twist, Willow used her wicca ways to share Buffy’s supernatural powers with all the slayers in waiting in the world. What followed was an epically beautiful montage that made a nod back to the show’s feminist roots. In the scene, girls from all parts of the world (from a softball-playing tween to an abused young woman) gained the power they always had within them. I’m not sure if it was because I am a girl and love to see grrl power in action or because I was just happy to see the gang kick evil’s ass again, but during that moment, I was an emotional wreck. Just to give you an idea of the power of this, here is the truly legendary speech the Buffster said before Willow did her stuff:

“What if you could have that power? Now. All of you. In every generation one Slayer is born because a bunch of guys that died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. (points to Willow) This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. So I say we change the rules. I say my power should be our power. Tomorrow Willow will use the essence of this scythe, that contains the energy and history of so many Slayers, to change our destiny.
From now on, every girl in the world who might be a Slayer, will be a Slayer. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power. Who can stand up, will stand up. Every one of you, and girls we've never known, and generations to come...they will have strength they never dreamed of, and more than that, they will have each other. Slayers. Every one of us. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?”

The tears kept-a-fallin’ after that as we lost two of our extended Scoobies. First went Anya – everyone’s favourite sarcastic ex-demon. Then went Spike – Buffy’s part-time enemy and lover. While Anya’s demise totally pulled at my heartstrings (I loved how she thought of the Uber-Vamps as bunnies), I have to say, nothing got me more choked up then when William the Bloody (that’s Spike’s other name for those not into the Buffyverse) sacrificed himself to save the rest of the Scoobies. I’m not sure if I’ll ever recover from seeing his hand burning in Buffy’s as he said his final “I love you” to the woman who slayed his heart.

While things were definitely teary during “Chosen”, in the end, the last episode of my favourite show left me feeling happy. The final moment where the Buffy, Xander, Giles, Willow, Faith and Dawn look out at the crater which is now Sunnydale could have been depressing. I mean, think about it, the town where every moment from the last seven seasons took place is gone forever. No more Magic Box. No more Sunnydale High. No more cemetary. No more University of Sunnydale. No more Bronze. But as they panned to Buffy’s smiling face, you wouldn’t help but feel hopeful.

In that final moment, Dawn asks, “What are we gonna do now?” (I don’t know if they were trying to do this, but it reminded me of “Once More with Feeling” and the song “Where do we go from here?”) I’m not sure what’s in store for the gang now that Sunnydale is gone (although I’ll admit, I read the whole first Season 8 comic last night) but I have some dreams. Now that the Buffster isn’t the only defender of evil in the world, maybe our girl will finally be able to feel normal. Oh who am I kidding? She’ll never be normal. But for once, at least, she can be happy (and maybe have some smoochies with Angel while she’s at it?). And that is enough for me.

So where will I go from here - from a life without Buffy? Well, I won't lie, things will be tough. But there are still those Season 8 comics left to devour. And then there's that cheesy 90s movie, which is always fun (especially the super-sexy Luke Perry). But truly, I think the best way to keep Buffy in my heart is to keep watching. Because no matter how many times I watch Angel turn into Angelus, hear Sunnydale get sing-song-y, see Willow turn witchy, cringe as Xander loses an eye, cry when Joyce's dies, fall apart as Buff kills Angel, laugh Anya makes some literal joke, scream as the Scoobies go silent or smile as Giles gets all British, Buffy and her Scooby squad will always have a stake in my heart. :-)

Barrymore bales out!: Drew steals my man candy (again..)!

2009-02-13T03:08:05Z

Drew Barrymore, we're fucking done professionally. You're a nice girl. You're a nice girl, Drew, but that don't cut it when you fuck with my man candy. Not really. But I have to say, our relationship is on the rocks.

After hearing some shocking news recently, Drew, I'm not sure if we’re meant to be soul mates (Grease 2 fan alert!) or sworn enemies. The one thing I am sure of is that we have the exact same taste in men. Observe your answer to People’s pressing question, “Who is your celebrity crush?”:

“Oh, easy. Christian Bale. He’s so cute! And I knew him when he was a kid. He was in Empire of the Sun. If he walked into the room now, I would totally clam up. Or I might go overboard and embarrass myself.”

My god, if you are going to be nervous in the presence of Monsieur Bale, then I have no hope at staying conscious. Maybe we can tag team attack him and save ourselves from awkwardness? You know you want to. But you can’t steal him for yourself. And if you do, at least give me Jason Segel’s cellular. I know you have it you saucy “let’s-do-Muppets-karaoke-and-make-out” minx. Oh and thanks for stealing my dream date idea. Geez.

P.S - In other Bale news, check out this mashup of Christian's freak out mixed in with the trailer for his Disney musical flick, Newsies. I don't know about you, but it makes me want to say ah-ta-da-da-da.

NSFW F*ckin Newsies! @ Yahoo! Video

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Boat and hoes. Boats and hoes. I gotta have me some boats and hoes..

2009-02-11T00:47:36Z

This makes me totally regret not buying that nautical themed pashmina afghan at H & M last week. Damn my boat-less existence.

P.S – Is it weird that I’m harbouring (he he...nautical puns rule) a serious crush on Jorma Taccone? It all started when I noticed he needed a few things from the grocery and did things alone now mostl-a-ly. But things got completely out of control when I saw him rockin' that burgandy Michael Cera-eque sweatshirt in this vid. I can't resist boys in gender neutral American Apparel clothing! To be honest, I totally would have taken Jorma on my boat ride for 3. Andy could come too (see the homoerotic yearning goin' on below). Sorry Akiva.

It's a bird, it's a plane..no it's a cirque de kickass girl face!

2009-02-09T05:19:27Z

This picture is better than Cirque de Face! (Don’t know what Cirque de Face is? You should. It’s all the rage with the frenchies).

I have always harboured a girl-crush for Kate Bosworth (it started with Blue Crush, blossomed with Win A Date With Tad Hamilton!, got serious with Superman Returns and became official when my friend Melissa's told me a story involving Kate calling her lipgloss "SASSY!" at the Elizabethtown premiere) but recently, I realized I want to be Zooey Deschanel. I’ve always liked her (I mean, she is the reason William listens to The Who with a candle burning in Almost Famous and the much needed comic relief in The Good Girl). But wasn’t until after the 500 Days of Summer preview totally engulfed my soul that I truly fell head over heels. Now I realize that she is just too cool for school. I totally love her retro style. She does the whole mod mini-dress with dark tights thing that I'm mad for. She makes me want to go out and raid a vintage store. And for the past day I've honestly considering getting full out bangs like her. I think I have a problem.

Anyways, the point is, I saw this picture and I pretty much had a mini girl-crush overload. I say mini because it isn’t quite complete. If ScarJo, Kate Winslet and Kat Dennings were in it too, I might just go over the edge.

That's So Alcott! (a.k.a Just call me Josephine Gagne..)

2009-02-06T04:04:11Z

(DON’T LIE JO. I KNOW THAT’S CHAI.)

So I’m reading Little Women right now and I’m head over heels for it. Honestly, every time I turn the page, I fall more in love with it (particularly Laurie, who is even more adorable than in the book, which I thought was impossible). Usually when I read a passage that warms my heart, I dog-ear the bottom of the page so that I can find it later. Today, while riding the subway I think I must have folded 25 corners. One page was particularly lovely.

Just when I thought I couldn’t be more like Jo March, I read this passage:

“With Jo, brain developed earlier than heart, and she preferred imaginary heroes to real ones, because when she tired of them, the former could be shut up in the tin-kitchen till called for, and the latter were less manageable.”

Louisa May Alcott, seriously, did you write this about me? I mean that would be really remarkable, what with the whole being from another century thing but I have faith in your talents (both written and psychic). You’re always struck me as a less flashy Raven Symone. You may be spunky but just don’t strike me as the type to wear faux snakeskin red patent pants.

She's the man-nequin? (a.k.a. Why isn't my life an 80s montage?)

2009-01-31T21:18:05Z

“Just because Jonathan’s fallen in love with a piece of wood, it doesn’t make him a dummy!”

I’ve watched a lot of ridiculously cheesy movies in my lifetime but the movie I watched last night might just take the cake for the most overdone piece of cinematic cheese ever created. It’s called Mannequin and it’s a blast.

Essentially, the plot is about this ancient Egyptian princess (played by a pre-Samantha Kim Cattrall) named Emmy (yes!) who is transported to the modern world in the body of a department store mannequin created by a hopeless artiste named Jonathan (Andrew McCarthy actually looking decent). By day Emmy plays doll and at night, she comes to life, but only in front of Jonathan, who has recently been hired at the failing store. Together they create fun window displays, revive the business and fall in love.

I know, I know. It sounds like the dumbest movie ever created but its way too fun not to enjoy, especially if you have a penchant for guilty pleasure flicks of the 80s (Grease 2 is my everything) like moi. I mean, how can you not love a movie that has animated credits or a character named Hollywood Montrose? Plus, it’s got one heck of a 80s montage complete with ridiculous costume changes (Emmy and Jonathan seem to recreate Billy Joel’s “Uptown Girl” at one point), Molly Ringwald’s brand of spastic dancing and a completely catchy song, “Do You Dream About Me” by Alisha. Oh yeah, and did I mention that the theme song is by Jefferson Starship and that it was nominated for an Oscar? Can a 80s fan ask for more?

If I ever meet Kim Cattrall (because I clearly I will), I’m not going to ask her about that other blockbuster romantic comedy everyone loves to talk about making sequels for. I’m going to ask her about this. And I’ll probably get the dirtiest look. But honestly, I don’t care. Long live the 80s!

P.S – Yesterday at Bay Street Video, they were playing Lucas – the 80s football flick starring Corey Haim, Winona and Charlie Sheen. It was totally rad!

P.P.S - There is a Mannequin sequel entitled, Mannequin 2: On The Move starring the original high school vamp slayer, Kristy Swanson. I must see this at once.

Summer lovin', had me a big fat nerd-tastic crush on Joseph Gordon Levitt..

2009-01-29T21:50:58Z

So I just discovered my new favourite trailer. It’s for an adorable looking flick called 500 Days of Summer starring the always quirk-tastic Joseph Gordon Levitt (3^rd Rock is still amazing) and Zooey Deschanel. I’m a sucker for eccentric love stories (or sorry, stories of love, as the trailer says) and with these two looking geek chic (Joseph, dahling, lovin’ the man-bag) and what looks like some random dance numbers (did you see that animated birdie?) I can only imagine that I will fall hard for this one.

Not convinced? Check out the official summary:

Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love. Girl doesn't.

This post modern love story is never what we expect it to be -- It's thorny yet exhilarating, funny and sad, a twisted journey of highs and lows that doesn't quite go where we think it will. When Tom, a hapless greeting card copywriter and hopeless romantic, is blindsided after his girlfriend summer dumps him, he shifts back and forth through various periods of their 500 days "together" to try to figure out where things went wrong. His reflections ultimately lead him to finally rediscover his true passions in life.

First off, did I just read that Joseph is playing a “hapless greeting card copywriter”? That’s just flat-out loverly. And what’s this about a story about where the girl doesn’t seem to be the lovesick one? It’s about time.

P.S – Do you love the song from the trailer as much as I do? Just in case you’re interested, it’s “Sweet Disposition” by The Temper Trap.

The United States of Moi or, "I always thought I was a Willow!"

2009-01-28T03:22:38Z

This is what happens when I get really bored.

According to my friends at MyHeritage, I’m part wicca, part super cheerleader, part deadhead, part Charlotte and part anxorexic socialite. How charming.

P.S - 83 % Hayden? Seriously? I don't see it. Oh, and I kind of can't stand her. Damn it, why couldn't my lookalike be like ScarJo or something!?

P.P.S - I would also like to point out that Rachel from S Club was also in the running. How fab is that?! After all, there ain't no party like an S Club party!

EDIT - 10:28 P.M.:

After another go at this thing (see below) I've found out that with make-up I'm actually a cocktail of Cher Horowitz, Britney Spears and Buffy! I always thought I was cut out for vampire slayage. And come to think of it, I don't know that I'd really be at home in the lesbian-wicca crowd. Sorry, Will.

P.S - Damn you Hayden! You and your shiny face will haunt my night terrors!

This news has got me feelin' hella good, so let's just keep on dancin'!

2009-01-27T00:46:43Z

Last week, I got some seriously rockin’ news about my favourite band. So rockin’, in fact, I totally neglected to blog about it and instead chose to dance around my house for days. Seriously. I almost burst into flame due to the endless movement. Luckily the Scoobies came to my rescue and pulled me out of the fire and into a less lively sing-song. (I wish).

Now that you’ve got a stomach-ache inducing amount of my nerdy references, let’s get down to the actual news. In case you haven’t heard…..NO DOUBT IS TOURING THIS SUMMER!

I don’t know about you but news has got me feelin’ hella good. (Sorry – I had to). I’ve only seen Gwen and the gang rock out once (as an opening act for the Rolling Stones) and so the idea of seeing them play all their classics live again pretty much rocks my world. Plus, I get this strange fangirl joy of seeing Tony (Kanal) and Gwennie Gwen rock out together on stage.

Even though Gavin seems like a great guy (although I’m still not sure about this love child thing..) I will always dream about those two falling madly in love again, making babies and having that simple kind of life Gwen sang about. Sigh. I know it’s totally impossible but I can’t help but miss the days when Gwen still wore those bindis (inspired by Toni’s mom!) and the group was thick with sexual tension and epic breakup tracks (“Don’t Speak” still rips my heartstrings out).

Are you are excited as I am about this? And thoughts on Paramore as the supporting act? Twilight soundtrack or not, I’m not feeling it.

THE 2009 SAG AWARDS: Sean Penn waxes phallic-sophical...

2009-01-26T05:22:14Z

“Something happened to me during the making of this movie. I noticed tonight that the statues have rather healthy packages...” – Monsieur Penn at Le SAG Award

God, I love this man. Just when you want to say, hey, Sean, why so serious, he pulls out some homoerotic joke and you just forget everything and get a strong urge to ravage his awkward beard with a ridiculous amount of overdone air kisses.

While I was most excited by his attraction to the rock hard hunks of statue, Sean did say some other things that were not phallic-focused, such as this gem:

“As actors we don’t play gay, straight...we play all human beings....This is a story of equal rights for all human beings.”

I couldn’t love this man more.

P.S – In other SAG news, Hirschy-Kisses looked ridiculously delectable! If I had it my way, I would have taken Josh Brolin's place during the boys' introduction of Milk tonight, making a very tight-knit sandwich between us and James Franco. Mmm...the thought alone is titillating.

(HOT MAN-WICH ALERT!)

Hey bud, let's party! (OR..why I belong in the 80s)...

2009-01-22T04:04:58Z

“All I need is some tasty waves, a cool buzz and I'm fine!"

I watched Fast Times at Ridgemont High the other night and it was – to quote Spicoli – gnarly. From the moment Spicoli said "Aloha!" to Mr. Hand to the scene where Stacy "loses it" jailbait style via the hopelessly irrestible tunes of "Somebody's Baby", I was lost in the sea of nostalgia laced bliss that only a kickass 80s teen movie can create.

I’ve seen the movie many times before but for some reason this time, I wanted to watch it again immediately after it ended. Maybe it’s because recently I seem to have a major thing for douches a la Mike Damone (see the last post) Or maybe it’s due to my inability to resist a 80s pop (THE GO GOS! OINGO BOINGO! THE CARS!! ). Perhaps it's a result of my always growing respect for the genius that is Sean Penn. Or could it be because for some reason, I have a fascination particularly witty coming-of-age stories? While all these explanations seem plausible, when it comes down to it, it's most likely because I was born in the wrong era.

Sure, the 50s had rad cars (I pray to own a vintage Thunderbird someday) and great sweater sets, the 60s had flower power and the Beatles and the 70s had Danny Zuko and The Dark Side of the Moon but the 80s, oh the 80s, were something else all together. Sure, it was materialistic but let’s face it – we all are material girls (and boys) at heart. Plus, I mean, let’s be honest, Madonna rocked the hardest in the 80s. Oh, and John Hughes is god.

Honestly though, sometimes I wonder why I don’t just start wearing “Frankie Says Relax” shirts and Day-Glo coloured leggings and do the Molly Ringwald spaz dance in the middle of an abandoned library. When you think about it actually, that might not be so weird now either.

P.S – FUN FACT! Did you know that there was a failed TV show based off this rad flick? And that it starred Patrick Dempsey? It looked like Saved by the Bell minus the kickass theme song ("When I wake up in the morning and the alarm gives out a warning, I don't think I'll ever make it on time..") See the opening credits for this and the trailer for the movie that inspired everything awesome (We wouldn't know Cher Horowitz or Cady Herron without it) below.

P.P.S - That was my skull, man!